tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post2512190561898873420..comments2023-04-10T09:06:59.448-04:00Comments on And She Says...: *dooooby dooooby dooooo...*Bellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12661488487041036742noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-56075886824574411482009-06-12T01:49:36.899-04:002009-06-12T01:49:36.899-04:00Can I say TABERNACLE?!!!
The point you made about ...Can I say TABERNACLE?!!!<br />The point you made about women being accepting of the husband's cheating ways because they got 'the ring'.<br /><br />You were shaming some folks.<br /><br />Point of it all,women don't be dumb broads.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16932988962021445953noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-70948353186784347332009-05-29T20:06:32.744-04:002009-05-29T20:06:32.744-04:00Gem is inside my head with her comment lol.
and @...Gem is inside my head with her comment lol.<br /><br />and @K.Michael thanks for being a brave male soul and speaking up :) lol my friend actually wants the MARRIAGE, she is quick to admit that she is in no position to be a mother right now. however, she feels pressure because she wants to be the one in her family who "gets it right" because her brother has 4 different kids by 4 different women. her mother is a single mother. and none of the ladies in her family have gotten married yet. so yeah she feels like she HAS to be married in the near future to "stop the cycle" (as she puts it)<br /><br />i just dont think people should base their lives on getting the thumbs up from others or trying to make a statement. like "ha! i did it!" u know? like she wants to get married just to say she has that. to me thats like buying a home before you even have the money to furnish it.Bellahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12661488487041036742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-34359543733656935332009-05-29T14:10:52.034-04:002009-05-29T14:10:52.034-04:00Hmm...
I think I'm the only man here, so I'll ju...Hmm... <br /><br />I think I'm the only man here, so I'll just say what I came to say. Marriage symbolizes what "The American Dream" is. <br /><br />This dream relies heavily on creating a family... so I don't think it's marriage in itself that your friend wants (as others have suggested), but a family of her own. The children, the house... <br /><br />--The whole lifestyle. In order to achieve this, you <I>have</I> to be married ...because otherwise people will look at you funny. <br /><br />In other words? You can't say you're successful without being married.K. Michelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07345153318451567247noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-30689110787463454742009-05-29T11:51:49.953-04:002009-05-29T11:51:49.953-04:00Bella, I totally agree. I am married, and I KNOW m...Bella, I totally agree. I am married, and I KNOW marriage is not valued anymore. I look at "friend" and my cousin. Both have been messing with these guys on and off for years. They are clearly not (marriage) compatible with these men for various reasons. But they string them on for when they hit 30 so they can get married and have babies because that's what it's "time to do". FUCKING BARF!<br /><br />Said friend's sister was engaged to this dude who emotionally and physically abused her, she and his twin sister got into a fist fight in his house and he did nothing to help her, etc. But she stayed because he had a lot of money and let her drive his Benz AND she had to be "mother" to his kids, 1 of which is developmentally challenged and the guy won't put her in special classes or anything. The engagement recently was called off and I am SO glad. <br /><br />Honestly, I got married young. But I've known my husband for years. Mucho, mas years. When I tell you we click, sync, everything, it's there. Even if our WORST fights and arguments, we know it will work out. Another thing is we are focused on US and developing us; not trying to pop out beige babies like babies are going out of style and "settling down". Fuck that, B.<br /><br />I'm also tired of bitches acting like age 30 is the end of the world, your eggs dry up and you become desperate. That is the apex of ignorance.<br /><br />Also, I agree that a few years under your belt does not equal marriage readiness. Be proud of the years you're investing in each other because if marriage does happen, it was a great investment that you took the time to really know each other, dookie crumbs and all. If you don't get married, it was a great investment in yourself whether you realize it or not.<br /><br />People need to stop looking at marriage as a means instead of an end.Gemhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04513613322991593085noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-23686866124893845962009-05-28T19:58:37.184-04:002009-05-28T19:58:37.184-04:00wowww! thank you all for sharing your thoughts! i ...wowww! thank you all for sharing your thoughts! i would LOVE to reply individually but im gonna be totally honest here, my comment replies would be super long and turn into a whole other blog post all in the comment section. lol! but seriously, i truly appreciate the comments, yall are great! :)Bellahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12661488487041036742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-56243493733493638412009-05-28T14:04:08.058-04:002009-05-28T14:04:08.058-04:00Great post. I couldn't have explained the topic an...Great post. I couldn't have explained the topic any better. <br /><br />I have my own views about marriage and relationships, but hey, what works for me may not work for others. The keyword is "me".Moniquehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09827625567697800795noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-27147298735008632102009-05-28T12:55:36.430-04:002009-05-28T12:55:36.430-04:00I just hope those who disagree with marriage for w...I just hope those who disagree with marriage for whatever reason have some good examples of what a great marriage is to go on personally. Not no fucking Obama or Bill Cosby or denzel. But some real people that you actually know. Like your parents or grandparents or aunts and uncles. I have those things. And I also know that Marriage is a great thing. I know you should marry your bestfriend and not just the person you're dating. I know that you can decide if you want to marry someone and it can happen in less then 3 years and can be successful. There are no rules on that. The only rule is that you truly love one another and aren't on any bullshit when you accept the ring or pop the question. Splitting up is easy, but it also cost you to divorce whether you're filthy rich or not. It's not free. <br /><br />I'm like you're friend. I wanna have kids and I don't want to do so until I'm married. However, that's not the only reason I'd take a husband. I have some prime examples of what a long and lasting marriage looks like and feels like and that's what I'd want for myself. Love and happiness and then children. And it's not about a piece of paper or a ring because if you truly loved someone they could make a ring out of some rolled up foil and get down on the knee and you'd be just as excited because the love is true.<br /><br />So I hope people don't get all caught up in what they see on TV and read in the media. It's not about what the bible or society says one should do. Because if we went on what today's society says, I'd just go fuck from random dude raw and have his kid and struggle. Since that's what the norm is these days. <br /><br />But do it for love, do it because your heart tells you to, or don't.Krissyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15718213064016248432noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-74283720335931330142009-05-28T12:11:42.122-04:002009-05-28T12:11:42.122-04:00let the chuuch say amen!
i think a lot of ppl are ...let the chuuch say amen!<br />i think a lot of ppl are just in love w/ the idea of the wedding, gifts, dress, and the rest of the hoopla. i'd rather be in a relationship, happy , without the marriage and scared some nigga bout to shyst me out of half my shit. lolsimone_diorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05123288718206437396noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-49908573335260207072009-05-28T11:17:48.350-04:002009-05-28T11:17:48.350-04:00I've been a lurker for some time now - I love how ...I've been a lurker for some time now - I love how you write, you remind me of my younger times, even though I'm not that much older than you are. :-)<br /><br />I know where your friend is coming from and although what's coming out of her mouth is marriage it seems that what she really wants is to be a mother. And I totally get that.<br /><br />See, you already have what she's looking for three (gorgeous) times over. It's kind of like a rich person saying money doesn't matter and you want to say, 'yeah that's because you have it'. You're absolutely right, we only get one life, one chance and it sounds like she's getting nervous because within that one life you get a small (getting smaller) window in which to have a baby. Once that window is closed, you're done. Over. And understandably, she's nervous about her window closing.<br /><br />Tell your friend to take a deep breath because you're right, a marriage won't last if it's forced. I know of highschool sweethearts who married at 30 and didn't make it to their first anniversary and others who married after a few months (crazy to me personally) and are still going strong after ten years. Time is important, but it's not the end-all measurement.<br /><br />Your friend needs to get really clear on what she really wants - marriage or kids. What if she marries this guy and it turns out he can't make kids? Will she leave? Then it's probably not marriage she's looking for. Because again, you're right - marriage is not 'I'll do it unless you do/don't do X'. It's I'll do it regardless and that 'regardless' is often too big and too scary for a lot of people and I don't blame them.<br /><br />The only person in this world we can change is ourselves. I'm sure you know as a mother your kids are their own people and you can guide them and teach them but in the end they're going to live their own lives (down the line, not right now. :-) ) Your friend needs to decide for herself what's more important, making a plan to have kids regardless of her romantic situation or letting the romantic situation be right first before bringing kids into the picture and find the peace in that decision. It's so easy to blame someone else - 'I can't have kids now because I waited for your dumb ass!' When in reality, you made that choice for yourself.<br /><br />Ok, this was a long ass comment, but I just had to speak on it. ;-)<br /><br />Peace, girl!Desireehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17783433189150911236noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-40503052651444205062009-05-28T08:35:17.772-04:002009-05-28T08:35:17.772-04:00Wow...you just elaborated on an experience I just ...Wow...you just elaborated on an experience I just had with a friend and posted about yesterday....except she married this unknown last week. I'm so disgusted with her I don't even know what to do with myself.Felecityhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15775357202156699759noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-91872223121201648032009-05-27T23:45:35.602-04:002009-05-27T23:45:35.602-04:00Whats your comments about Tiny marrying T.I.? THAT...Whats your comments about Tiny marrying T.I.? THAT popped in my head when reading this LOL <br /><br />SUCKER for love is correct on that note lol but I agree...what's the rush? I say [I'm 25] that if its meant to happen; you'll KNOW. It won't be forced or anything. People so damn desperate these daysAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-90691791700517982282009-05-27T23:43:39.730-04:002009-05-27T23:43:39.730-04:00im soooo glad yall feel me lol i was like "wonder ...im soooo glad yall feel me lol i was like "wonder if im gonna offend anybody... *type type type* yeah like i give a fuck."<br /><br />hahahahahaha!Bellahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12661488487041036742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-46722135217232672212009-05-27T23:43:00.927-04:002009-05-27T23:43:00.927-04:00I FEEL YOU! 3 snaps in an isoceles triangle n shit...I FEEL YOU! 3 snaps in an isoceles triangle n shit. I do want to get married one day but I want it to be RIGHT. I know the fairy tale shit is just that, a fairy tale. But I want to get as close to that as possible, when I feel that with someone, I'll know he's the one. I never pictured myself married but I so want that...one day, when it's right. Not just because it's convenient.Epitomehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17166896975087011611noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-89637625939036171432009-05-27T23:40:30.727-04:002009-05-27T23:40:30.727-04:00Loves it. I'm all for marriage, but not to the ex...Loves it. I'm all for marriage, but not to the extent of doing it just because. I think, despite how "loose" our society is as a whole, people feel marriage will save them from looking "loose" because their child(ren) live(s) in the same house as BOTH of their parents. Smdh but people just don't get the point.Le Mamba Noirhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11565615892297706646noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8429808662071171821.post-15912256614417860262009-05-27T23:30:36.385-04:002009-05-27T23:30:36.385-04:00And see, I feel the same way. Marriage, if its rea...And see, I feel the same way. Marriage, if its real, doesn't need a slip...folks think I be tripping though. Why want marriage for the sake of marriage? What does that prove? Are you living a piece of the American dream? Yea..umm, no. I've said I wouldn't get married unless my partner wanted it, cause when I'm down for you, Im all the way down, so the paper isn't necessary for me. Needless to say, I feel you, homie.Linahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12940593405238789964noreply@blogger.com