Sunday, March 29, 2009

Well Alritey Then!!

you'd think this fool just scored a touchdown... or got some bomb ass pussy... or won the lotto... but nope. he just won a ping pong match.


Saturday, March 28, 2009

Why DO We Love Love?

Why does it seem, statistically speaking, that a majority of female's goal in life is to be in love? Is that all there is to life? And this is coming from someone in a happy relationship so don't think this is one of those "bitter" posts. No it's not perfect and yes we've had ups and downs, you have no idea, but if we don't last I figure it just wasn't meant to be. And yes I'd be hurt because we've shared so many happy times and memories with eachother, but I'd be okay. And I wouldn't be scared to walk away if that's what needed to happen. And I wouldn't feel defective if he left me, if that's what needed to happen. It would just be... life. I notice this issue pretty much everywhere. In real life, online, in blogs, on television... everybody is searching for love. And why?

I really blame the Lifetime Network for this shit lol. Like why do we have an epidemic of females searching for, anticipating, and expecting to find love? Love is no joke. Love can never be planned or coordinated. Love will just happen to you when it's supposed to. And if it isn't happening when you want it to, then it just isn't your time. It doesn't mean something is wrong with you or that you're doomed for loneliness. It just means that you have more living and growing to do and that can be achieved with or without a man by your side. I think females should spend more time concentrating on themselves, wether you are in a relationship or not. You can't expect to build a life with another person until you've built one for yourself. Established who you are, what you are willing to accept, and what you want to achieve in life.

My man does not define me, he compliments me. He does not complete me, we are a team. I was already a whole woman before I met him and my happiness does not revolve around him. But his presence in my life is still very much appreciated. I just think a common mistake women make is getting too caught up in a man. Like once they get swept off their feet or fall head over heels, they change. They communicate less with their female friends, hang out more with their man than their female friends, and want to spend most of their spare time with him. If this man is your husband, then that's cool because he's officially your BFF for life at that point anyway lol. But if it's not that type of party, be easy. Have a life of your own and let him have one too, especially if it's still "new." Now by new I mean even the first year or two or three. Yes that is still considered new to me. How long exactly do you think it takes to get to totally know another person? My point can be illustrated by asking another question: how long did it take you to get to know yourself? I bet you sittin there not even totally knowing yourself right now as you read this lol. So you see where I'm going with this?

Love takes time, real time. This is why people who get too serious too young, don't tend to last. And this is another reason why divorce rates are so high. People get married too soon these days. And again, I also blame Lifetime lol. But it's the media in general really. Painting picture perfect love tales on the movie screens and television shows. Got bitches out here daydreaming about a love like that. Wake up! That shit is NOT easy to come by. Every man who makes you smile or gives you butterflies or puts it on your ass... is NOT "the one" okay? Learn him. Know him. But most importantly, learn you. Know you, first.

I've made the mistake of thinking I had found it all, and said to hell with everything else. I was like "Okay, finally a man who treats me right and makes me smile and puts me up on a pedestal, I'm good now." Only to learn a year and a half- and a child- later that he was a physically abusive man. I would have NEVER seen that coming. If only I had not just assumed he was the best thing since sliced bread, I wouldn't have ignored the red flags that I noticed only in hindsight. I was so blinded by "love" that I refused to believe he was capable of any wrong or harm. I know not every person's experience is this extreme but it does prove that you have to take your time with love. It takes two people to make it work, together. Not one trying harder than the other. It actually shouldn't take much effort at all. Love is not a job or project. If you feel like you have to work hard at love, it probably isn't love. And on another note, if it seems to come too easily then that probably isn't love either....

infatuation- noun
1. a foolish and usually extravagant passion or love or admiration
2. temporary love of an adolescent
3. an object of extravagant short-lived passion

Notice the word "extravagant" mentioned 2 out of 3 times in that definition?

extravagant- adjective
1. spending much more than is necessary or wise; wasteful
2. excessively high
3. exceeding the bounds of reason, as actions, demands, opinions, or passions.
4. going beyond what is deserved or justifiable
5. Obsolete. wandering beyond bounds.

Pretty cut and dry huh? I'm sure there's nothing we can disagree with there right?

Hmmm... okay so let's see now, how can we define love?

love- noun
1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
3. sexual passion or desire.
4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.
5. used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection, or the like. ie: Would you like to see a movie, love?
6. a love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour.
7. sexual intercourse; copulation.
8. (initial capital letter) a personification of sexual affection, as Eros or Cupid.
9. affectionate concern for the well-being of others: the love of one's neighbor.
10. strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking for anything: her love of books.
11. the object or thing so liked: The theater was her great love.
12. the benevolent affection of God for His creatures, or the reverent affection due from them to God.
13. Chiefly Tennis. a score of zero; nothing.
14. a word formerly used in communications to represent the letter L.

SYSTEM OVERLOAD! What? All of that is love? How?

See what I mean? Take your time people, take your time. You can't define love. You need to know that there is no such thing as love until you actually experience it. I can't tell you what love is. Your momma can't tell you what love is. And evidently, not even the almighty know-it-all dictionary can either. So if you're out there looking for love, um it doesn't know you like that, stop stalking lol. No I'm joking but I just want females to know that there is more to life than the quest for love. "Live ya life" suddenly popped into my head just now... sorry I'm random. But anyway, if you've already found and defined it by your own experience, lovely. But if you haven't, that's lovely too. I hate to quote a damn ketchup commercial but fuck it, the best things come to those who wait. Yeah I'm soooo deep ain't I? But regardless of where it came from, it's still the truth.

And before I go (damn this shit was long! my bad son lol) I want to leave you with the best quote that I've heard about love so far...

"Love is when you only want the best for someone, even if it doesn't include you."

For those of you who've experienced love, what is it to you?

Thursday, March 19, 2009

I Can't Hang

i suck! i attempted to follow an exercise dvd that i ordered and couldnt even keep up with the lil gay fella. so sad.

"step, step, step, 1,2,3, tap, tap, tap... now point. and heel, toe, heel toe, step, step, step, okay now step, touch, step, touch..."

maaan... the fuck did you smoke for breakfast u lil hyper summabitch?

first of all im exercising in a tube top n some thongs like i dont own mad wifebeaters n booty shorts. fugg yall i had that tube top on under my peek-a-boo shirt today n i just took my jeans off like fuck it. okay anyway so my extra tall ass in a tube top tryina keep up with this fool. i got frustrated n confused. fuckin up the sequence. pausing, tryina pick up where i left off. lookin like a big ass doofus. i realized i needed to just sit my ass down somewhere when i literally yelled at him on my tv.

"what the fuck is you doin bitch?!!"
*turned the tv off and ate a brownie*

Monday, March 16, 2009

Fiesta, Fiesta!

i had no children this past weekend and my homie Ava Dior was in the A so we had to go out. i dont get out too often but when i do, i like to go to Opera on fridays. we went on a saturday tho, and i was a lil disappointed in the DJ, i wanted to throw an ice cube at his ass on more than one occasion. this fool played bow wow and ciara's song in the damn club... go home, ur fired.

(yeah i was feelin it)

but whatever, we didn't let that ruin our night. not too long after we got there, one of the bouncers tapped us and asked if we'd like to go upstairs and meet his "VIP friends" and drink for free the rest of the night. free drinks you say?

just lead the way sir.

so we get our wristbands and follow him up there into a "booth" overlooking the dancefloor. then he introduces us to the VIP guest who apparently wanted some company, Greg Oden from the Portland Trailblazers. and i feel bad for saying this but i will anyways cuz its obvious wether i point it out or not but he's uh "rather unattractive." the only thing keeping me from just straight callin him ugly is that he has good manners and also shared his liquor with us lol. which by the way, not a great idea to pour patron and grey goose into identical clear glass pitchers and sit them side by side n tell people to help themselves. made me a strong ass patron n orange juice, oops! lol so i guess me n patron are cool again. me and ava were sittin there like "he's gonna kick us out cuz we're not showing him any groupie love... oh well, we're just here for the drinks" lmao

didnt feel much like dancing. til they played some reggae (nooo, nooo, nooo u dont luuuuv meeee and iiii knoooow nowwww... oh sorry) mr. oden made me pinky swear to a dance, so i danced with him shortly, but he said he had a bad knee. he couldn't hang lol anyway so me n ava danced for a few minutes then went back downstairs. i guess we made some friends...

i dont remember takin this pic. but i do remember booty dancin up on ol' boy to the left and that chick next to him was his girl... i suppose? she came kissing him while we were dancing but i didnt notice til ava said something lol. oops. neither of us ladies are single but the point of going out is to enjoy yourself, so that's what we did. even tho i swear the deejay needs a t-shirt that says "DJ Fuck Up" on it... smh.
and i somehow managed to drive back home (drunk) better than i did driving to the club (sober)... which i still dont understand. love ya ava!!
and the rest of my night is detailed in my other blog, too x-rated for this one lol.
peace out! ♥

Sunday, March 15, 2009

And The Award Goes To...

Twisted Elegance and Piink Cupcakez gave me a "Your Blog Rocks!" Award, thank you lovely ladies :)

I was instructed to keep the love flowin and nominate atleast 5 blogs for this award as well. So without further delay, here are my nominations (which will exceed 5 lol):

1. Imperfect Sense by Ava Dior- she put me on to this, without her i'd still be writing in my raggedy ass notebook and yall would have never hear a word from me lol (love ya!)

2. THE Karrie B. by karrie b- random, smart, funny as hell. how could you go wrong with that?

3. Amber Alert by Amber (duh)- she cracks me up, i feel distantly related to her lol.

4. Socialite's Life by Nina- she just keeps it real and uncut. loves it!

5. The Other Side of Phlyy- she is straight HILARIOUS.

6. Bombchell- In Atlanta- she always has fun pics! and her hair is fly too lol.

7. O Hell Nawl- straight up gotdamn ignorance all day every day, it don't get no better than that.

8. I Run Through Babymommas by William H.- he's funny and tells it like it is from a man's point of view. yeah bitches, believe it or not, life is not all about us.

9. Year of the R A E by J.Rae- she's a bad mutha-shut-yo-mouth. i love her energetic personality, she has an admirable i-dont-give-a-fuck-ness about herself lol.

10. ...yup, simone be talkin shit by simone_dior- never a dull moment. just recently started following her blog and i ♥ it.

And of course I'm throwing nominations right back at Twisted Elegance and Piink Cupcakez (still unclear if that's against the rules or not but oh well, they deserve it).

Now... go follow those blogs! (if you aren't already lol) and if you were nominated then here are the rules:

1.When you receive this award, show that you're happy to the giver.

2.Nominate at least 5 blogs, that you think rocks.

3.Let them know about award in their post.

4.Now blog like you've never blogged before

And thank you to all my readers/lurkers for comin thru:)

P.S. this was kinda tedious (for me atleast lol) so if you don't have the time or care to follow the rules then that is perfectly okay, i just wanted to show some love :)

Friday, March 13, 2009

Call The Coroner

cuz yo ass bout to be *dead*

i had to share this video posted on O Hell Nawl (one of my favorite places to be unproductive at work lol)

lil donatello aint EVEN playin with that sketcher!!

whoolawd, i just had to share this shit before i lay it down.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Foolish ♥

so me and my hunny are watching cage fighting together and we start talkin shit to eachother...

him: see that, that's how i'll do you rite there. just bust u in the forehead like PLOW!

me: uh-huh. go rite on ahead mufucka, i'll kick u in the liver, watch.

him: yeah rite. i hear ya talkin!

*we notice a mean left hook on tv*

OOOOHHH SHITT!! gooootttdaaayyyyuuummm!!

him: put yo ass in a headlock...

me: what? i aint NEVER scared.

him: put u to sleep. be in the papers like (insert my name here) was put to sleep by a headlock today. the alleged headlocker, (insert his name) had this to say...

*i cut him off*

me: "bitch left the kool aid jug empty again, shit..."

him: *bursts into teary laughter*

(i stay "forgetting" to make kool aid after i drink it all. but so does he! shit.)

now. im bout to go have me some confrontational sex :)


Wednesday, March 11, 2009


so i was leaving the grocery store and happened to notice this fool's license plate.


on a FORD FOCUS?? for real homie?

you get a F in stuntin, a big fat mother-F-in F!!!

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Daaaamn Homie!

check how this man catches the holy ghost, at his WEDDING. lmao

she must have some really good stuff right? got a fool callin out "glory!!" at the alter n shit, you go girl!! lol

New Shit

i changed my layout (finally lol) and my playlist. i'm pretty content, for the time being.

the song you are more than likely hearing right now, cuz it's the first one lol, is rich boy "drop" and that shit is sooo fuckin hard to me! if you don't know rich boy by his name alone, you should definitely recognize "throw some d's on that bitch" and if you don't? *slap* i think he's pretty slept on and i hope this shit gets on the radio cuz it KNOCKS! shit if i hear this in the club... i'll probly start bobbin my head hard as fuck n act straight ignant up in that bitch lmao

the 2nd song, blame it on the al-al-al-al-al-alcohol... just makes me wanna get tipsy n shake my booty :)

the 3rd song, maaan yall dont know NOTHING bout that shit! when i typed that shit in the search and it actually came up, i literally lost my gotdamn mind lol. started dancin all kindsa nasty. "kill the bitch" yesss!! i me some damn reggae.

the last two songs were already in my playlist before. you can never go wrong with 2pac! and that mobb deep "quiet storm" just takes me back in time to NY, ahhhh... when that shit first came out and i heard it in the club, i got a bit carried away n started shoulder bumpin bitches for no reason lmao. shit i couldnt even help it.

alritey then im about to get some cleaning done. but before i go i gotta share what my youngest son just said. him and his brother were getting their play clothes on to go outside and he couldn't find his other sneaker. so i went in the closet and found some old chucks and was like, "here just put these on."

this knucklehead...

"but they're dirty!"

"boy they play shoes, they're supposed to be dirty, hush."

"but i got my spider man socks on!"

"so? what u can't wear dirty shoes cuz you got spider man socks on?"

*shakes his head with a sad face*

"uh uh."

"look, they're clean inside punk. they only dirty on the outside. see?"

*inspects the inside n puts his foot in*

kids are crazy lol.

Friday, March 6, 2009

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Help Me! Please? :)

im sick of my layout. im sick of googling shit to FIND layouts. im sick of finding one i like and THEN it doesn't work. getting all types of error messages i don't understand n shit. see i can't be fuckin around with html. if the shit isn't good to go from jump, i want no parts of it. i've only changed my layout/template/whatever like twice since i started this blog... i think? and i dont even want anything fancy, that's what's pissin me off. i just want something simple like black or dark gray with some pink. no flowers or weird ass designs or stupid pictures... just some PLAIN shit. why is that so hard to find? any suggestions?

and if any of you say pyzam...

*shakes fist*

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Who Made The Potato Salad?

i LOVE this movie.

FYI: the BEST part is at 2:30... no matter how many times i see this shit, i laugh so hard my face hurts.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

We Gettin Arab Monay!!

i know, i know... im going to hell. and YOU are coming with me! mwuahahaha!

but you can't tell me they not GETTIN IT IN tho!!

Monday, March 2, 2009

No Words

I really have no words. Other than I don't give a hot fuck what this girl said or did, she is 15 years old!!! And he's a grown ass man! As much as the world wanna get all up in Chris Brown and Rhianna's domestics... it's obvious there are MUCH more serious problems in this country. And WHY is that other bastard just sittin there like everything is cool???

If that was MY daughter.... oooooowheeeee!!

P.S. Years ago, that same officer shot and killed an unarmed, mentally disturbed man during a traffic stop. How is this muthafucka still employed in law enforcement?!?!