Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Give Me a Hour Plus a Pen and a Pad

A couple things I've written over the years...

"Love & War"

so where do i start
and how does this end?
when the one who broke my heart
was also my best friend
how can i separate the two
when the man who hurt me
and the man i love is you
how can i think straight
when you've put all these tears,
and yet so many smiles on my face
how can i tell you to go
when i'm so used to you here
i just don't know...
my heart is at war with itself
and my mind is caught in the crossfire
when the smoke clears what's left?
you on one side
me on the other
two souls
staring at eachother
looking into your eyes
trying to decide
if we're enemies or allies
if love can conquer pain
and i'm so confused
it's driving me insane
but life is too short
and we've come too far
all i know is...
we're better together
than we are apart.
------------------------------------------
"The End..."

i don't know what more to do
or what more i can say
so what im going to do
is just walk away
cuz i reached out for you
but you stayed beyond my fingertips
and i tried to spell it out for you
but you didn't wanna read my lips
i see you're not ready now
maybe someday that will change
but i can't sit around
if my waiting is in vain
so i'll give you time, give you room
and let you figure out
what you wanna do
you know what they say
if you love someone... set them free
and maybe someday
you'll come back to me
so i'll gracefully bow out
for the next contender
i will be okay
i just hope that you remember
who's been by your side
through the thick and thin
but i'm done training for the title
when you don't even want me to win.
---------------------------------------
Untitled

If you can take just one more step
Soon you will realize
There's so much more ahead
Than there ever was behind
Every rose went through dirt
To bloom into a flower
But it was worth
Every single shower
Every storm gave it strength
And made it a little stronger
So don't give up faith
Just hold on a little longer
You haven't come this far
Just to stay buried,
Just to fall apart.
You came to flourish.
--------------------------
"Un-Spoken Word"

in a room full of haze
a focused mind sits
a soul with intent
thru these eyes gaze...
sick and tired of being sick and tired
but a heart so inspired...
knows there's better days
and a spirit unbroken
with no words spoken
still gets it point across
all doubts ceased
when this Beauty becomes a beast
to fend for her young
I have a Daughter.
She has Brothers.
See my strength.
I am a Mother.
---------------------------------
"Unbreakable"

I'm the realest bitch
I'm more realer than reality
I know that ain't my shit
But I'll say it anyway
Cuz all I speak is truth
And what I breathe is life
With this pen I shoot
These words into the night
This ink is my blood
My sweat, my tears
My pain, my love
My days and my years
I confide in paper
White, green, and brown
I'm a paper chaser
Never see me down
I might trip but I won't fall
My heart may be heavy
But still I stand tall
Could be down to a penny
And still I won't crawl
I'll never ask, never beg
Cuz I'm in this race
Until the last leg
With a smile on my face
Even while clouds overhead
Try to rain on my grace
Just remember that I said
I'll still finish first place
-------------------------------
"Quiet Storm"

From outside you can't see
I'm breaking down inside
From all this weight on me
I have too much pride
To complain out loud
So I cry in my mind
These tears from clouds
Raining in my heart
Rising to my eyes
In silence they start
Spilling all my lies
Fading my fake smiles
Into silent cries
While I try to be strong
But I need to let go
In order to hold on
So I let these tears flow
To help ease my pain
Relieving all my sorrow
To help keep me sane
So I can smile tomorrow
After the rain.
--------------------------------
"You Just Don't Know"

I don't even know what to say
The things I'm thinking, I shouldn't
Damn how you make me feel this way?
I wanted to tell you but I couldn't
I'm standing here all hypnotized
But you'd never know how I felt
Just by looking into my eyes
In your arms I could just melt
But instead I stand here strong
Trying to act like a big girl
Like it didn't phase me at all
But it moved my whole world
And made me shiver inside
Almost made my mind go numb
Probably put a haze to my eyes
And made all my thoughts run
But I regained my composure
And backed up from your grip
When I wanted to hold you closer
And caress you with my lips
You don't know how much
I wished you'd grab my hips
And lure me back in your clutch
Then kiss me one more time
The way you did just now
How I held the urge inside
I have no idea how
But as I watched you go
I was staring at you leave
Like "Damn you just don't know"
But some day I'll make you believe.
-------------------------------------
"Ssshhh..."

Have you ever tried
To listen to silence?
Just hold me tight
Let's hear the quiet
The wind outside
Gentle like your breath
Like your fingers through my hair
While I rest upon your chest
With your heartbeat in my ear
Silence sounds so nice
When I hear you live
You're the one I like
To be quiet with.

That is all for now :)

3 comments:

jessica rae said...

you need to get them shits published! those are hot !

Bella said...

aw thanks!!

how do i get them published? im slow.

Ava Dior said...

i really like "shhhh"

you know you're dope miss lady